Today ah ‘eard a noise so terrible it curdle mah blood.
Islamb, ‘oo iz a sheeps, was wandering around by ‘erself, when she suddenly let out a noise zat sounded like a big fog ‘orn.
(I know it sounded like le fog ‘orn because Le Uncle Persil zaid zo).
PAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRP it went.

Muslamb, daughter of Islamb, ‘eard ‘er and zuddenly…

All Le Sheeps come running over to find out what iz going on.

What iz it? What is it? zey ask, iz it le revolution?
Look, said Islamb, zumzing is written on le salt lick!
Zey all ran over to have a look but by le time zey ‘ad all tried to decipher le ancient writings ‘alf le salt lick waz gone.

Ah could ‘ave told zem not to eat it before zey read it…

Of course, ah ‘ave learned to keep mah big mouth le shut
especially when Muzzerr iz right be’ind me, so ah keep quiet.

Az a French ‘orze, ah do not like Muslamb or Islamb but ah do get on well with Gollamb ‘oo iz le son of Islamb.
Ah zee ‘im and go over to talk to talk to ‘im.
‘e and ah ‘ave a good laugh about  what ‘iz Muzzerr zound like.

Le noise waz zo awful, it make le ‘air on le back of mah neck stand up, ah zay…

Ah start to run…

And zen, in le middle of le chat wiz Gollamb, zon of Islamb,
mah Muzzerr bellows at me.
Son!, she yell, zo loud all life forms come to a ‘alt and look at ‘er… Of course ah too instantly stop what ah am doing, ah waz zure she going to tell us le end of le world was coming.

‘Have you cleaned you teeth?’ she ask.

Of course ah ‘ave not, zo ah cleverly only give ‘er le side view.

Zen ah ask Persil if ‘e ‘as cleaned ‘is.
‘e gave me the sharp shift.

Zen we all wander around and pretend nuzzing ‘appen.

Zuddenly ah get le idea to run over to check if there is anyzing amazing written on our zalt lick.

And ah am pretty sure zere iz zumzing about me being le zon of God, which explains why mah fazzer never visit – ‘ee too busy;
and zumzing about being mad in China.