Today Mah Aunty Roz came all le way from from Wellington to pay ‘er respects.
‘Allo allo’ ah say politely.
Then ah show ‘er mah clean teeths and give ‘er
a leetle french kees while ah am at eet.
Ah can not believe ‘ow forward zis woman ees.
‘owever, because Uzzer Muzzerr is wanting to take a
photo of la kiss ah agree to le photo opportunity and we try again.
Zis time ah am more wary.
Ah admire ‘er scarve. ‘Look Uzzerr Muzzerr’, ah say, ‘eet ees in mah colour’.
Ah try to remove eet but mah Aunt from Wellington appear not so keen.
‘Come on’ ah say, ‘such a scarf would look very much betteur on me’.
‘No, really’, ah insist, ‘it suit me more than eet suit you’..
Then ah ‘ave to give een. Uzzerr Muzzerr eez coming towards us and she does not look pleased.
‘You Hairy little Turkey’, she say, ‘Stop being a rude boy’. Ah try to insist ah am merely pointing out le truth but apparently, ah am een big trouble.
So ah turn on le water works. Ah sniff and ah sob and ah gasp and
suddenly ah am getting ‘ugged and kissed and told ‘ow ‘andsome and clever ah am.
Ah let ‘er continue to cuddle me and feel bad for me.
‘I’m sorry,’ ah sniff, ‘ah do not know what got in to me. Ah am a very bad leetle boy’.
Eet eez working. Ah feel a carrot coming on.
Then, quelle ‘orreur, ah spy Uzzerr Muzzerr listening to Moulamb Rouge!
And Muslamb tells ‘er not to listen to a word ah say because, she say, ah am ‘aving ‘er on. Just as ah am getting very concerned, ah realise Uzzerr Muzzerr ‘as no idea what le sheeps are saying. She think they are talking about their wool styles.
eh eh eh.