Le Uncle and ah were busy discussing important stuff lark
‘oo eez le most ‘andsome ‘orze in le paddock (Ah zink we all know ‘oo zat eez)
when Uzzerr Muzzerr arrived.
Ah walk over to greet ‘er.
Ah am just about to ask ‘er ‘oo she think eez le most ‘andsome ‘orze
in le paddock when ah see somezing ‘orrific.
A man’oo look suspiciously lark mah Dad
but ‘oo eez a fashion disaster – zo eet can not be ‘im.
‘Uzzerr Muzzerr’, ah zay, ‘Please tell me zat eez not mah Dad.
Muzzerr wanders over and spies ‘im. Ah can tell she ees shocked.
‘Son’ she zay, ‘Stay where you are, I will deal with this’.
Ah cannot stop looking at le clear violation of le paddock fashion requirements.
Ah would never wear such a costume, but then ah am French, we know better.
Muzzerr take another look. ‘He may have carrots,’ she says hopefully.
Of course zat could change everyzing.
Muzzerr ‘as ‘er carrot radar out. ‘Are you sensing carrots yet?’ ah ask.
We all wait eagerly for le results of Muzzerr’s carrot scan.
As le tension mounts, ah raid la milk bar While Muzzerr ees distracted.
‘It’s enough to make my hair curl’ say Le Uncle. And ‘e eez right.
‘is ‘air ‘as gone all curly.
Suddenly, le results are in, la walking fashion disaster ‘as no carrots.
We are all een shock.
‘Oo dare to visit me wiz zo many pockets yet carry not one carrot.
‘SHAME on YOU’ we all yell.
Ah turn to Muzzerr and apply a liberal amount of Le Slobbeur.
‘He is SLOBBERING all over me again’ she sighs, but ah don’t care,
ah am seizing le moment to ‘ave anuzzer drink.
All zis stress eez driving me to eet.