Today, we visited all le sheeps ‘oo are in my old paddock.
Bedlamb and Le Uncle Persil are old friends so zey ‘ad a chat …

before Le Uncle got all silly and showed off some of ‘iz ‘ip ‘op moves.

well ah got le giggles when ah zaw zat and ah could not stop laughing.

Le Uncle Persil look so zilly every time ah look at ‘im ah laugh zum more…

Zen ah zaw zumzing else zat crack me up –
my ‘Dad’ in la paddock trying to encourage le sheeps to do zynchronized zwimming practice. Even Lambo iz aztounded.

Zo of course, even though ah try not to, zat zets me off again…
 

Zat iz, until my Muzzerr start up, zen zings are not funny any more, just embarressing.

Eventually ah decide it exercise time…

Ah run zo fast mah ‘Dad’ and Lambo left wondering what just passed zem.

Zen ah zlow down and prance about for a bit like a show pony…

But zat getz boring and ah am a race ‘orze zo ah gallop faster zan a mistletoe …

Ah gallop zo fast around Myrtle and The Good Sheep Lollypop, zay zink it iz le ‘adron Collider gone past.

Le Uncle Persil got all bouncy …

but ah use mah tail like a propeller and now ah almost fly…

Mah Muzzerr try to keep up but ah am far too fast for ‘er.

Le sheeps now calling me Le God Particle. (Zey all read Scientific American)

Finally mah batteries run flat and ah need to recharge.

Mah Muzzerr make sure ah don’t over charge and explode.

Today, ah find mah imaginary friend ‘iding out in my Muzzer’s ‘airy armpit.

What are you doing ‘ere? Ah zay. But ‘e do not reply.

Zo ah may ‘ave given ‘im a bit of a push…

Zuddenly ‘e iz not zere any more…

Zo ah check ‘er knees.

All of zem. She ‘az a lot of knees, and ‘e might be clinging on to zem

Ah check le ground to zee if ‘e ‘az fallen off zumwhere.

And zen ah feel ah must talk to Muzzerr about zis.

Muzzerr, ah zay, Muzzerr, ah ‘ave zumzing to tell you…

What is it my son? she zay.

But before ah can speak ah feel ah ‘ave to check ‘er stern for extra cargo.

What are you doing my son? She ask.

Zuddenly ah don’t want to tell ‘er about mah friend zo ah make up a bit of a fib.
Ah tell ‘er ah will ‘old ‘er ‘ead up for ‘er, az she must be tired.

Silly boy she say, I have a neck to do that for me.

But ah insist, your neck iz not good at ‘is job, ah zay, your ‘ead iz always down in le grass.
Zo ah will ‘old it up for you.

Only problem iz, ‘olding up my Muzzer’s ‘ead iz thirsty work so pretty soon
ah need ah drink.

Muzzer ah zay, just do not ask me to ‘old up your big fat bottom.

Starting today, ah am training to be a War ‘Orze.
Training to be a War ‘orze, takes le skill and le dedication.

One must start by learning to control La stick.

From zere, one master control a la petit frond

Before moving on de le branch control

Zis iz very dangerous you understand and must not be attempted by just any old ‘orze…

But zen, ah am le type of ‘orze ‘oo court dangeur.

It can take a normal ‘orze many year to master, me ‘owever, learned mastery over le branch in less zan 3 minutes…

Zen ah take a break and move on to anozzer of mah disciplines – zat of le ‘armonica playing…

And zen ah check to zee what Le Uncle Persil is doing.
‘E iz talking to la girls through le fence as usual

So ah carry on at mah War ‘Orze practice using La Grande epole
(you can never ‘ave too much training practise)

Ah check to zee what ah would look like wiz a beard…
Not bad at all ah ‘ave to zay.

And finally, seeing az neither my Muzzerr nor le Uncle are taking any notice of me, ah come for a cuddle from my Uzzer Muzzerr.
Zumtimes, even a War ‘Orze like mahself need la cuddles, besides, she zink ah am le most brave, clever and ‘andzome War ‘Orze in le paddock.
And zat includez le Uncle.