Today, quelle ‘orror, ah nearly lost mah life in le battle of la Wounded knee.

Ah decided to take on a fence – no fence can better of Le Mighty Zephyr.
Zis might look bad to you but, you should zee le fance.

‘What a brave and strong son I have’ zaid mah Muzzerr when she went to look at le scene of le fight.

‘Just look at how he took on this fence and came out alive’ she said, ‘MY son’.

‘Crikey’ zaid le Uncle, ‘is ‘air standing on end wiz le shock of it all.
At least ah zink zat iz ‘iz ‘air – if it iz not, it might be a small ‘airy porcupine.

La Uzzerr Muzzerr came out to apply sum ointment on my wounds.

Being a ‘elpful sort of ‘orze, ah lift mah leg zo she don’t ‘ave to bend zo far.
Now ah walk wiz a limp just like ‘ers.

Ah do not mind all le fuzz

She even get le ‘ose out and ‘ose it down, but ah am a brave ‘orze ‘oo does not flinch away from ‘orror.

Le sight of Uzzerr Muzzerr staring up at me showing me all ‘er teeths  iz ‘orror enough, but still ah do not move.

Besides she remind me what a brave and ‘andsome little boy ah am
and ah ‘ave to agree.

Just between you and me, she could ‘ave added zat ah am also incredibly strong and fast, not to mention brilliant.
All zees zings ah ‘ave ‘eard before of course.

But she didn’t,  zo ah limp away wiz mah wounded knee

‘Ah am off for a lie down’ ah gasp, ‘ah zimply must rest now, a wound like zis could cost me mah life you know’.

Ah lie down and prepare for death.
Bravely pointing out le cause of death to le sheeps  ‘oo ‘ave crowded around.

After ‘alf an ‘our of dying, and impressing le sheeps,
ah get bored and ‘ungry zo ah ‘ave to get up and eat somezing.

Ah did not expect to zee la two Muzzerrs laughing at me.
Zat iz not mah bottom be’ind zem.
It must be le uzzerr little ‘orze sneaking in for a quick drink.
I can not drink anyzing, mah wounds could yet prove mortal.