Today ah can’t ‘elp but notice zat my Uzzer Muzzer sneak into le paddock and zit down to spy on me.

Zo, ah zink to mahzelf, ah will outwit ‘er.
Zo I walk over, very casually and pretend to die, on top of ‘er.

She ‘ave no idea ah am really alive, zo clever am ah.

She staring right at me but ah am good at being dead.

Pretty zoon ah actually fall asleep. Le Uncle zay later, zat my snoring alerted mah uzzer Muzzer to le fact zat ah am not really dead.

Ah zuddenly realise Uzzer Muzzer ‘as got up and left!

‘Ang on a minute! ah yell, You can’t just walk away!

But apparently, she can.