Ah ‘ave been promoted to position of Paddock Customs Inspecteur.
Uzzerr Muzzerr congratulate me for being such a clever boy.

She found a branch and wave eet at me. Ah assume she about to make me Branch Manager also. Of course ah a’ve to turn this down as ah am too busy already.

Then we ‘ad a little talk.
Ah ‘ave no idea what she on about, something about a
‘clever and ‘andsome little boy’ blah blah but as usual she go on and on and on.

Then she kiss me

So naturally, being french,  ah kiss ‘er back.

And le next thing ah know she ‘ugging me and kissing me and ah am quite embarrassed.
Ah am far too old now to be kissed and ‘ugged by Uzzerr Muzzerr.

Then eet ees time for me to go to work.
Ah spy le first suspect trying to cross into le paddock border, so ah rush to stop ‘im.

‘Excusez-moi Monsieur’ ah say, ‘old out your ‘and that ah may inspect eet’.

Of course, ‘e does as ‘e ees told and ah am able to discern
that there ‘as been a carrot een this ‘and up to ‘alf an hour before now.

‘Ah am sorry Monsieur’ ah say, but ah can not let you pass
without a complete and thorough inspection.

Ah continue.
”Eet ‘as come to mah attention that you may be trying to
enter le paddock with le carrots on your person, where are they now?’
‘e deny all knowledge of such thing as ah knew ‘e would.

All of a sudden, ah spot le contraband.
‘AHA!’ ah yell triumphantly.

‘Monsieur, what ees this?’

‘E ees a shifty character.
‘What, this?’ ‘e say, ‘it is nothing’.

And ‘e rustle eet about but ah am ready for le carrots to drop out at any moment.

Ah quickly and efficiently confiscate all 5 carrots.
‘Let that be a lesson to you’ ah say. ‘Do not try to ‘ide your carrots from me’.

Of course Uzzerr Muzzerr saw eet all unfold.

She commend me for mah bravery.

But ah am a modest ‘orze. Ah do not mind posing for le picture
even eef Uzzerr Muzzerr ees doing le Photo Bomb.