Today, my Muzzerr iz being a pain, she follow me everywhere.

Enough iz enough already ah zay, ah am a big boy now; look, ah can do zis.

But she will not listen zo ah ‘ave to run away wiz la pooch.

Of courze ah can outrun any pooch.

Ah play wiz my ball for a bit.

But zen zomezing catch mah eye.

It iz la cat and ‘e is wearing mah tail!

Ah get an awful shock about zat but luckily Muzzerr ‘ad a drink ready for me.

And ah forget all about my tail after zat.

This morning, az ah was pretending to ‘ave died, Ah zee mah zecond Muzzerr coming over to pay ‘er respects.

Ah bestow a royal kiss on ‘er.

Zen it iz time for me to teach ‘er ‘ow to ‘andle me.
She ‘as a broken elbow you know.

She iz quite well be’aved .

Ah gracefully pretend zat she iz training me.

I zink we all know ‘oo trains ‘oo in zis paddock.

Zen she decides ah must wear zome face furniture.

Ah do not mind, it iz only for a short time and la colour suitz me.

I talk to my Muzzerr about it later, az ah zee she iz wearing ‘er face furniture.

Ah receive a visitor today.
Mah visitor be’ave in le appropriate manner in le meeting of a Paddock Prince like mahself.

She pose for photos with me  of course, ah take it with a grain of salt.

Zen along come Muzzerr and ruins la shoot wiz ‘er incessant vacuuming.