Today we all saw a ‘ole cartload of ‘oly Crap delivered to someone up la road….

I knew it was ‘oly Crap when ah saw eet.
Eet was le first zing zat came to le mind.

Le Uncle yelled ‘HOLY CRAP’ when ‘e see eet coming up le road.
This confirm mah suspicion.

We all wonder ‘oo eez going to get eet.

Le Uncle – ‘e eez very brave, ‘ee approach le cartload of ‘oly Crap zo ah go with ‘im to ‘ave a look.
‘Stay back and let le boys ‘andle zis one’ ah say to Muzzerr.

Zen Le Uncle eez walking next to le big ‘orze zo ‘e can ask ‘im about all zat ‘oly Crap.

Personally ah zink ‘e lark le idea of being ah deliverer of ‘oly Crap.

Muzzerr and ah follow too – she want to know ‘oo eet eez being delivered to.

Le Uncle and ah talk about eet later.

‘Mate,’ e say, and zen ‘e say a ‘ole lot of stuff een Australian.
As usual ah ‘ave no idea what ‘e ees on about.
Ah put mah Quite Interested Look on.

And ah agree wiz everyzing ‘e say even though ah ‘ave no idea what ‘e eez saying.

Suddenly we notice a ‘ole ‘erd of cows coming up le road.
‘Holy Crap’ zay Le Uncle but ah am able to inform ‘im zat zey eez la cows not le ‘oly Craps. Mah eyesight eez better zan ‘is.

But Le Uncle continues to insist zat eet eez anuuzer load of ‘oly Crap – on and on ‘e go. Ah am getting very bored.

Ah ‘ave better zings to do zan stand around listening
to an old man going on and on about nuzzing.

Besides, ah ‘ave a cunning plan.

Ah am sensing Uzzerr Muzzerr eez about to arrive
so ah race to put mah plan into action.

‘Crikey’ say Le Uncle as ah gallop past,
and Muzzerr eez still trying figure out what just ‘appen.

Ah get on le ground and ah cover mahself wiz ‘oly crap.
Eef people lark zis stuff so much zey get eet delivered by le cart load,
Uzzerr Muzzerr will love zis ah zink to mahself.

Ah nonchalantly graze le grass, waiting for Uzzerr Muzzerr to notice.
All of a sudden, ah ‘ear ‘er yell ‘HOLY CRAP!’
And ah know mah cunning plan ‘as worked.